1. The annual assessment that proves that she is still "disabled" and can qualify for secondary insurance. There is the pulling together of documentation, medical records, provider notes and school paperwork. There are yes and no questions that are not actually not that clear cut. There are boxes to check off and ratings to score.
2. One second everyday. I downloaded it, then got frustrated and deleted it, because I didn't upload any videos. Fast forward a few weeks, and I re-downloaded it and got a tutorial from a friend. Now I love it. Sometimes I need a hands-on training for new techie things.
3. Hugs that last just the right amount of time.
4. The 47 degree days in January that feel like an actual miracle.
5. His debate team has an undefeated season. And they win the State Championship title. This is a first for our high school.
6. Prosecco and Chambord. Roasted veggie salad + arugula + goat cheese. The best gluten free pizza that I cannot stop thinking about. Crispy thin crust with mushrooms, arugula, parmesan + truffle oil.
7. Fingers crossed that we just had our last trip to Boston till the Spring, when flu and norovirus season takes a downturn. Fingers crossed that we didn't pick any new germs up while we were there.
8. Ladies weekend in Ogunquit.
9. Not apologizing for needing movement & silence.
10. How "and" or "both" are my favorite choices.
1. After needing insulation and a new roof for several years, this home improvement project is finally done. What a huge relief. And a very boring, but necessary way, to spend money.
2. Saying to a friend "add this to the list of the things we didn’t know, until we had to know them."
3. The return of Tiny William Shakespeare.
4. Memories of the college food cart where I worked in Madison, Wisconsin. Where I learned to make Spanish TortilIa from scratch. I find the not-often-used mandolin to thinly and symmetrically slice potatoes and onions. I sauté them in olive oil till they are almost translucent. I beat the eggs and add it to the dish cooking it stovetop and then in the oven. I haven't made this dish for 20 years, and in a flash of memory , it returns to me.
5. The joy of homemade Ramen night. So many dishes to do, but oh so good.
6. The organization makes another $10,000 research donation. And plans are coming together for a long held, and never spoken, wish for a family summer camp. Dreaming and scheming. And following the magical thread.
7. Asking for a sign and receiving one.
8. He qualifies to represent Maine in the National Speech and Debate championships.
9. I know that I will never stop hunting for moments.
10. The tumble that reminds me [always] of how things can and do change in an instant. How even though brains are protected by bones and layers, that they are fragile organs not to be jostled or bonked. How sad and angry it makes me that we can just roll with a concussion, because we have practice and experience with medical life. We are experts in how to navigate systems and communicate with providers clearly and how to get what we need. And so, we sit and wrestle with how to help her to rest her brain, while it does it's healing and encouraging stillness and quiet, in a girl that is so very full of life.
1. Forty degrees and torrential rain makes it feel like spring. We lose so much snow cover that I can see the grass again.
2. Knowing that not everything deserves my attention or a response. Trying to remember that in the moment.
3. The local lab that employs the phlebotomist that we have known for 6 years. Her skill, big heart, kindness and compassion makes blood draws so much easier for the girl.
4. Questions.......how do you make the magic real? Why do small towns often live up to the reputation of being small minded? Why do we need more providers? DO we need more providers? Why aren't there more options? Why do some of the options work for some, but not others? When will I write the book? How can I be available for caregiving needs and also bring in more income? Why won't the driver's education place call me back? Why, why, why?
5. Pinot Noir and a low gluten brownie from Boulangerie. Nighttime snack of champions.
6. The feeling of weight being lifted off of my shoulders and chest as I empty my email inbox, reorganize shelves, toss papers and put items where they belong. I know this is true. But the feeling of relief is visceral after I do it. Why can't I remember this?
7. Reading books authored by other medical mamas.
8. Smudge finally has his own Instagram account. This fact, and giving Smudge a voice, brings me immense joy.
9. Scars. Quotes & songs about scars. Wisdom of scars. Platitudes about scars and what they mean in terms of the people who have the scars. The healing of an open wound. Scars.
10. Plans for an overdue friend weekend are in full swing. T minus 12 days till we convene for shenanigans.
1. We celebrate the new year with a newly created tradition. Oysters at Eventide before noon, without the usual hour long wait, as the rest of Portland is still sleeping after New Years Eve.
2. It has been so cold for so long. We have used 20% more oil than we usually do, as we've had the thermostat turned up higher than our usual 68 degrees. We leave faucets running, so the pipes don't freeze. It's so cold that I am sick of hearing myself complain about how cold it is. I wake up in the middle of the night hearing strange sounds. The ocean freezes. What? The ocean can freeze?
3. Pink winter skies that take your breath away. The full wolf supermoon.
4. We concoct a drink out of freshly squeezed grapefruit juice, lime juice, tequila and St. Germaine. She names it "The Denial."
5. The last college applications are submitted. There were so many supplements to write. The practice for the winter musical begins. I might already know all the songs.
6. I don't choose a word of the year [again]. It doesn't feel right to me.
7. The blizzard that canceled the out of state Endocrinology appointment, during the back to school week, that did not have much back to school time. Learning the word bombogenesis.
8. Late night phone calls.
9. Arnica on sore muscles. Epsom salt tubs. Wishing my skin and hair had more moisture during this time of year, because I feel dry and creaky. Finding a hot oil treatment and massaging my own scalp and hair with coconut oil. I am now a greasy mess, so I sleep with a towel on my pillow. I wish I had a shower cap.
10. Majorly purging the kitchen, dining room and my office. Piles to keep, piles of garbage and piles for goodwill. Hello to 2018.