#MedicalMama

We gather....going the long way around to the coffee shop that used to serve wine.

The long way is the only option, because it's a small town, and there is construction and "you can't get there from here".  

I decide to travel early, because I'm a planner, and the flashing sign tells me that construction will start at 8am. I leave at 7:30 to avoid the construction, but things have changed, and the road is now closed.   Instead of a five minute ride, my journey turns in to fifteen minutes.  

It's no longer a straight line to get to where I am going.  

I meander through morning traffic in our sleepy coastal home.  
I am deep in thought about my day.  Thinking about the have to's.  
Feeling the tightness in my shoulders and upper back.  Sensing that I am not breathing deeply.  
I drive by the health food store, the spot where I got my first tattoo & the Dairy Queen.  
I am stopped at a light near old brick buildings that hold years of memories.   
A left turn, a quick trip around a roundabout and drive by the high school, and I am finally there.  
At my destination.  

We gather.
First one, then two, then three, four and five.
Hearing updates and words and worries and sitting with the unknown.    
New diagnoses....new plans....new treatments.
Holding sadness, shock, familiar and new illness, grief, uncertainty and rage.   
{Holding}
Sharing words, love, kindness, ideas, strategies and space.
We tell stories and laugh and shed tears.  
{Humor has gotten us all thru so much}    
We are hopeful.
We understand.  

We gather.
But today is a bit different.
Today, we skype her in from the hospital room to see her, to hear what she needs, to stay connected and to get a sense of how she is doing.  
She is the patient now.  
The unfairness of this situation is so present & painful and yet so sadly familiar.   
We are keenly aware that so much of this life can be unfair.

She is gorgeous and smiling and in great spirits.  
She has chosen to shave her head before chemo begins.... before she loses her hair.  
She is fighting and is accepting the help of strangers and friends and is asking for what she needs.  
She is a rock star.  
Her job is to get better.  We will help her take care of the rest.  

"I do believe we're all connected. 
I do believe in positive energy. 
I do believe in the power of prayer. 
I do believe in putting good out into the world. 
And I believe in taking care of each other" - Harvey Fierstein