“To rise, first you must burn.” ― Hiba Fatima Ahmad
About two months ago, I had a spiritual experience on a pop-up canopy tent.
You know the type. White painted metal, sometimes used for camping or summer activities, other times used to shelter a farmer's market stand.
It took three of us to get it into position. To jigger it and open it and put it up so it could house our welcome area and the spot for making flower crowns.
We wrestled with it. There was grunting, groaning, sweating and a lot of swearing. There were buttons that were missing and sliding parts that didn't slide.
But we did it. We made it happen.
And it was an exceptional pop up tent that met all of our pop up tent needs & hung out at the lake with us for the duration of the retreat.
Fast forward to our last day at the lake.
We were charged the enormous task of removing all of the magic we created from the property. We swept and cleaned and stripped beds and stuffed cars to the brim.
And the pop up tent remained. Upright. Like it was taunting us. Telling us that there was no way we would be able to deconstruct it and fit it neatly back into the bag that it arrived in.
We tried to collapse it, according to the directions and plans, and how other pop up tents usually worked. But we had no luck. It would not give. We pushed and pulled and used brute force to try to get it back into it's starting shape.
But it did not work.
So we did what any resourceful person would do. We destroyed it.
It's amazing how quickly you can destroy something, once you decide to do so. We twisted metal with bare hands. We broke it into a hundred pieces.
At one point, I was legit jumping up and down on the pop up tent. [a highly recommended experience if you ever have the opportunity]
While I was jumping on it and smashing it to bits and laughing so loud...
[release, baby, release]
She said, "I'm not sure I've ever seen you so happy"
She said, "This destruction is so good for you"
She said, "Throw it in the lake!"
She said, "I've been feeling on the verge of tears all day and now I feel so much better."
Since that experience, I have been totally tuned in to how much I need & want opportunities to destroy & release. It feels so dang good.
To let go.
To burn it down.
To start again.
To be the phoenix.
To emerge from the ashes.
New. Ascending. Alive. Alight.
And so I will rise.